Breathalizer (I Ready To Blow)

Intro (Talk)

Bring on de breathalizer!
I am de rum-strategizer!
And so what if I ah l’il tipsy
Is not me drunk on power
While driving de country!

Chant Chorus

Blow fuh blow blow blow
Ah drinkin mo mo mo mo
Come an test meh! Mr. Patos
I ready to blow!

Stanza 1

Patrick! Yuh tek way we security
Yuh tek way we peace and harmony
Yuh even want to tek way we property
Rum is de last straw keepin we sanity

Yuh lucky we still drinking!
Yuh cyah tek dat from we!
Thank goodness dat de boozin
Still essential to de party!
Who de hell you tink foolin?
Wit yuh two-face morality!
Yuh ass is grass if we start losin
All de joy inside we society!

Chorus

Like yuh doh know
It go be blow for blow
Come an test meh! Mr. Patos
I ready to blow!

Designated driver- I ready to blow!
Peanut oil- I ready to blow!
Garlic and chilli- I ready to blow!
Suck brown paper oi- I ready to blow

Blow fuh blow blow blow
Ah drinkin mo mo mo mo
Come an test meh! Mr. Patos
I ready to blow!

Stanza 2

Patrick! Yuh lying bout de economy
Yuh storm radio stations who disagree
Yuh even try hard to sideline Rowley
Yuh only like “Yes Men” in yuh party

Yuh lucky we still drinking!
Yuh cyah tek dat from we!
Thank goodness dat de boozin
Still essential to de party!
Who de hell you tink foolin?
Trying to impress Her Majesty
Same time yuh busy breaksin
To fix problems in de country

Chorus

Like yuh doh know
It go be blow for blow
Come an test meh! Mr. Patos
I ready to blow!

Sweaty workout- I ready to blow
Six Power Mints- I ready to blow
Tambran chutney- I ready to blow
Smoke herring stink- I ready to blow

Blow fuh blow blow blow
Ah drinkin mo mo mo mo
Come an test meh! Mr. Patos
I ready to blow!

Bridge

Yuh lucky we still drinking!
Yuh cyah tek dat from we!
Cause if we wasn’t drinking
It would be riot in dis country!

The blasted traffic- Blow for blow
Two million dollar flag - Blow for blow
Rapes and murders- Blow for blow
The passport drag- Blow for blow

Chinese slavery- Blow for Blow
Construction fraud- Blow for Blow
Non-stop spending- Blow for Blow
While Patos praising de Lawd- Blow for Blow

Chorus

Like yuh doh know
It go be blow for blow
Come an test meh! Mr. Patos
I ready to blow!

Blow fuh blow blow blow- Roadblock lookout
Ah drinkin mo mo mo mo- Coconut meat
Blow fuh blow blow blow- A teaspoon ah curry
Ah drinkin mo mo mo mo- Sweat in de heat

Come an test meh! Mr. Patos
I ready to blow!

Blow fuh blow blow blow- A dose ah Buckleys
Ah drinkin mo mo mo mo- Drive de back road
Blow fuh blow blow blow- Anything with dairy
Ah drinkin mo mo mo mo- Vicks in yuh nose hole

Come an test meh! Mr. Patos
I ready to blow!

Blow fuh blow blow blow- Cod Liver Oil
Ah drinkin mo mo mo mo- A spoon ah Kulchela
Blow fuh blow blow blow- Two vitamin B
Ah drinkin mo mo mo mo- Switch to marijuana

Come an test meh! Mr. Patos
I ready to blow!

Written by Jessica Joseph © December 2009